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My wife was sharing something new she learned while we were going out to eat one evening. She told me about a guy that just completed a successful marriage enrichment course and was attending a seminar where the speaker asked the audience what they thought the biggest cause of divorce was. Since this guy had just successfully completed a related course of study he proudly answered, “sex, money, and communication!” and the speaker’s voice boomed back a loud response of “wrong!” My wife asked me the same question before telling me the story and I thought communication was the right answer. I know I would have been embarrassed if that happened to me in an audience.  The speaker’s answer was, “The reason marriages end up in divorced or dissolved is because of unmet expectations.”
When my wife told me this for some reason I could really understand the reason. It would not matter if it was a new client at the fitness center, someone single, married, young or old. I could see this relating to a lot of folks. In some cases I have seen clients come in and think that they will be able to sweat through 70% of some of the workouts and eat just about everything they want as long as they ate a salad at some point that week and then wonder if there is something medically wrong with them because in their mind they are “eating clean” and working out and they should be seeing some spectacular results.
 
Expectation – Observation = Frustration
Frustration = The difference of the two
 
To correct the frustration we must place our observation in front of our expectation. Remember life happens. Nothing stays the same and if you are following a plan just know at some point you need to be ready for something to come up and cause you to change. There is no such thing as a straight line to success. If you are expecting some form of results observe what it is going to take to get those results and know that there will have to be several changes in-between the time of commitment and the results one seeks. 

A coast guard helicopter pilot was sent to rescue people who were in the ocean because their boat had capsized. The helicopter could only hold 10 people and they had 30 people in the water. When asked how do you determine who to save the pilot answered we can only save the people who are swimming towards us.
 
Have you ever found yourself worrying about things you can not change?
 
A very successful friend of mine wanted to vent. As I listened to his issue I recalled worrying about a very similar issue. After listening and asking a few questions I asked him if he would like me to provide some feedback. He replied that he would. I just told him to stop worrying. Worry is not going to change the result of what has already been done. Think about it… if you ate some fried chicken and you are supposed to be watching what you eat, or if you really need to mow your lawn and the weather man forecasts rain, or if you cracked your smartphone and you are not sure if you backed up your data, worrying about it will not change anything.
 
Let’s start by looking at what research has said about worrying in general:

• About 85% of the things we worry about never happen.
• If what we worry about does happen, 80% of us said we handled the outcome better than we thought we would.
• People who let go of worries instead of stressing over them are much healthier than those who don’t.

 
We can really work on reducing some of the stress in our lives by not worrying about the issues we cannot change.  If you have eaten something you shouldn’t have, if you have a chore to do, or if your smart phone is damaged it would be a healthier option to stop worrying about it. One thing in life is certain and that is that there will be uncertainty. It would be a great idea to learn to look for it and find the joy in the changes of life.
 
 
Of those that do not know this exercise has been proven to help stimulate the production of feel good brain chemicals and improve your self-image. If you have trouble focusing on the workout at hand music might be the ticket to pushing your further and harder in your workout routine. If you really challenge yourself you will need to focus on the workout at hand and your worry will fade away.